Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Banana in the tailpipe....



Just when I thought that mine eyes...damndit mine eyes...wouldn't witness just blatant coonery and outright tom foolery.....I mean this utter and total malarkey.....WHAT THE FRENCH TOAST!! 

(SORRY BEEN TRYING THIS NEW NON-CURSING THING)

First of all, who has created this 3-D porn? Is it that got damn Stephen Spielberg and his fucking CGI. So let me get this, you don't watch porn....yet your first attempt to watch porn, you decide that you want the three dimensional experience...get the fuck outta here....

Second of all, your lily white ass has a black baby and you want me to believe the sperm from a black mans dick shot out the TV, flew across the room and entered your vagina through your clothes by osmosis and still had enough strength to fertilize one of your eggs?? Stand up take a bow, you have just completely mind fucked everyone who reads this...

Why don't you just fess up because now another human life is at stake here....I mean you might as well sign him up for the short bus now, cause when he say "Momma why doesn't my daddy look like me?" What will your response be?

"Well my nigglet child, you were conceived when mommy was watching some high tech porn. I was just sitting there watching this Mandingo penis  going in and out, in and out and the HD resolution toppled with 3-D effects made me feel it was my vagina in the movie and I was so stimulated that I became pregnant with you"

And the sad part is that he will believe you because you are his mother, and why would his mother lie to him....you selfish bitch you...you've just signed him up for ass whoopings for the rest of his natural child existence...he will probably grew up a social recluse who will never properly please a woman unless technology is involved....thanks mom!

And your husband, your poor poor husband....off fighting this never ending, shouldn't have ever started, pointless war...and you send him word of this shit..if he hasn't already I'm sure he wanted to go run in a mind field with C4 strapped to his ass....it would be actually less cruel than what you're doing to him now...if I was him, my only true inspiration of making it home alive would to be so I can give you and whomever helped you come up with this dumb ass story a .45-caliber court marshal.

 

You're so delusional thinking that he actually believes you, and the truly truly sad part is that I'm starting to think he does, cause you have not shown up on the news missing or dead. So please please please fess up! Do whats right. When your husband comes home, sit him down and say,

"Honey, I love you. The time you spent away I was lonely and feening for penile penetration. When I told Becky she told me how the best she ever had was from this black guy in the projects named Tyrone. She then took to meet him, where seconds after meeting him, he had me and Becky bent over a couch. Now since he was soo big, I told him that he didn't have to wear a condom and proceeded to let him bust off in me cause it felt too good to make him stop. Now we have this black child that I expect you to raise with me."

Cause that would be a lot less cruel than this bullshit you came up with!! Fuck outta here with that!!!
I'm done (kicks soapbox and drops mic)



1 comment:

  1. When I saw this I had the same reaction that you did, however it has been confirmed that this story was originally published in the satire newspaper The Onion.

    ReplyDelete

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